John Laurie adds John Laurie to the roster

Interview by Juan Camión.

Having spent a somewhat gruellingly confronting morning with them at the local nail salon (it was John’s idea to do the shoot there whilst getting a pedicure) I finally sit down at a local cafe with John Laurie and John Laurie and discuss this exciting new partnership.

John hands me a business card. I couldn’t help but notice John was wearing tennis shoes.

“Are those tennis shoes?” I ask a little confused

“Yes. “ John states matter of factly

An awkward silence ensues…..

“We are really thrilled to announce this ……

Excuse me. Is this the cheapest wine on the list?

“It’s $11 sir” the waiter quips

“Ok we will do a bottle of that please. “

“Sorry about that. Where was I ? Ah yes…we are thrilled to announce this new relationship with John Laurie” says John

“It feels like I’ve come home” John says gushingly as he takes a sip, grimacing at the seemingly poor quality of the wine that John has just ordered.

“Good lord that’s dreadful. “ John whispers under his breath out of earshot of his new agent.

“Sorry John, you said something?” John says.

The atmosphere has all of a sudden gotten a little tense …

“Obviously there will be some early teething problems that we will have to overcome” John remarks sternly

“I’m eager to make a real go of this. John seems like good people although he at times can be a little difficult to deal with on a few matters that we won’t discuss here. We are working through this” John states resolutely.

The lightly grilled cheese sandwiches arrive at the table. It’s an unusual pairing with the $11 house wine. John begins to slice the crusts off to the amazement of his new photographer.

“This is perhaps one of those things we are working through” John says

“Look champ, you stick to button pushing and I’ll worry about the rest” John announces, throwing an unusually poorly performed wink for no apparent reason to no one in particular.

Combined with the cheap wine and barely toasted cheese sandwich, ontop of a morning of watching two grown men receive pedicures, a wave of unbridled nausea comes across me.

Dabbing his mouth either side with the now ripped paper napkin, John, who seems to believe he is dining at The Ivy instead of the local truck stop,  stares intently at John. The frostiness between them returns.

“Change doesn’t happen overnight” John says swirling the plastic tumbler of cheap wine around. The wine swirl is far to aggressive and it covers John across the table.

“Apologies for that. That’s on me” John not nearly apologetic enough states.

John pays the bill leaving a modest $1.20 tip and hands his business card to the confused short order cook. His constant and inappropriate hustling to the wrong audience is something I note down.

We head for the door and shake hands. John hands me yet another business card to go with the two he has already given me.

I turn on my heel and walk off a little more confused than perhaps when I arrived.

………………………………………………….

Feel free to contact John directly for any work related enquiries or advice on wine pairings. He may not get back to you immediately due to an unhealthy addiction to tanning beds.

For more of John’s work take a look at www.johnlauriephoto.com. A Director’s reel is available by request. John will also be kindly supported by some wonderful freelance producers – a select few who can tolerate his nonsense.

insta@johnlauriephoto

Email: john@johnlauriephoto.com

m: +61 407 346 813

With apologies to the kind people who were involved in this shoot. None of whom really knew what they were getting themselves into. Photos by Cory White. Blending of Johns by Tomas Friml. Foot spa and manicure by Emma at Brighton Nail Salon.